Early evening. I sit out on the back steps, letting the last of the Autumn light run down over my shoulders. In the yard, under the canopy of the old oak, bronze leaves come loose from the branches. Float and spin down slow. A mixing bowl of cool water rests between my knees, and […]
Tag: anorexia
Let’s talk …
Last week, quietly and without much fanfare, alpha // whiskey // foxtrot surpassed a milestone that still blows my mind a little bit: by my latest check, I’ve got 1,066 followers and counting. I’ll be honest: this is both wonderful and a little unsettling. Most days, I envision myself writing to about as many friends as I […]
be still …
Noon. I curl up on the down-filled sofa under the big bay window. Watch the light flickering down through the limbs of the old oak: There is nothing I must puzzle out here: no meaning to decode. No sign or symbol to deconstruct. There’s just me, with the sun warm on my skin. And the sun […]
When I am running in the dark, in a river of light …
Two days ago, for the first time in a long time, I ran. * There’s a little event held every Tuesday in Roanoke called the Pub Run. It begins at Wasena City Tap Room and loops through the greenway in either a three-mile or five-mile course. It felt strange, and also comforting, to run in such a […]
I am going to tell you a secret now …
At least once a week, some kind, well-meaning person asks me when I am going to write a book. And inside, where you can’t see it, I flinch. Now, the Current Me, the one you can see standing in front of you — she doesn’t flinch. She stands there with her smooth face and her smile, […]
This is me, before I wore my body like a ball & chain … {on innocence lost … & joy reclaimed}
The other day, while rummaging around in an old box of photos, I stumbled over this snapshot from the 1990s, and I just couldn’t look away: For two days now I’ve been going back to it, trying to puzzle what it is about the image that haunts me so. And then today, it struck me: […]
on shadow & light, sunshine & silhouettes … & seeing my own magic
This evening.
I am walking the dog at sunset, stopped at a street corner, waiting for traffic to pass. I am lost in thought.
Suddenly a car flashes by, and for the briefest moment I glimpse …
Same Body, Second Glance: Last Look
August 10, 2014 Today my heart is hungryfor some new horizon.I’m not talking about a placeyou get to with a passport.I’m talking about a placeyou get to by opening your eyes. And I want to reclaimall the places inside meovertaken by darkness–dark not because the lightstopped shiningbut because my soulstopped seeing. /// {{Wondering what’s going […]
Same Body, Second Glance: Day Forty
August 9, 2014 Today is my fortieth day … Can you believe it? And *this…* This is what I’m holding onto… ❤ /// {{Wondering what’s going on here?? Almost a year ago, I found myself on bad terms with the person in the mirror. So I made a commitment: every day for forty days, I’d […]
Same Body, Second Glance: Day Thirty-Nine
August 8, 2014 You guys know this is a brave photo for me … BRAVE. So I must be having that kind of day today. ❤ /// {{Wondering what’s going on here?? Almost a year ago, I found myself on bad terms with the person in the mirror. So I made a commitment: every day […]
ASHLEY WILSON FELLERS 